Wedding Rules Traditions That Are Optional

Whether you want a classic wedding or something more edgy and modern, you don’t HAVE to follow the “standard” wedding rules or silly superstitions. It’s YOUR day, forget the traditional wedding rules and do it your way! Here are some of the most common “wedding myths” and how to rise above them. Take control and have the wedding of your dreams!

It’s “Bad Luck” To See Each Other Before the Ceremony

This dates back to pre-arranged marriages where bride and groom didn’t even MEET before the wedding. Lots of couples are opting out of this tradition and taking advantage of “first look” photos, a rising trend in modern day weddings. This gives the photographer a better chance to capture that “magical moment” when the couple sees each other for the first time in their wedding ensemble. It can also give family and close friends an intimate moment with the couple and more chances for photo ops, thus saving time between the ceremony and the reception. For small and intimate weddings, another fun idea is to be with each other until you both go in separate rooms to get dressed, then the tradition stays in place and the wait is not as long.

Hiring Your Friends Is A ‘Great’ Idea

One of your friends may offer to officiate the ceremony. This may SOUND like an awesome idea, but many couples regret making this decision. Not all states even ALLOW this so check if this is something you really want. Also, hiring your college-roommate as the DJ may actually turn out to be a disaster. Save yourself the drama and hire professionals. Let your friends and family attend as guests and enjoy the day.

Bouquet And Garter Tossing At The Reception

This is a time-honored tradition that supposedly reveals the “next to be married.” Not all couples want the frenzy of single friends fighting over the bouquet and garter. Nor do most brides want the groom displaying her bare thigh for all to see while he removes the garter and then tosses it to one of his drunken buddies.

Many couples have been simply handing the bouquet to a cherished friend or loved one, or even the couple that has been married the longest as a sweet sentiment of love and remembrance.

The Bride MUST Be Escorted Down The Aisle

Not everyone has that “special someone” in their life to walk them down the aisle. That’s okay, if you want to fly solo, it’s YOUR day and YOUR moment to shine. Let all eyes be only on you. And besides, if you have a puffy dress and narrow aisles, it might be best for you to go it alone.

The Wedding Party Attendants Must Be Evenly Matched

Really? Your wedding party should consist of the people who mean the most to you: your closest friends, coworkers, and family; not a mob scene of everyone you know. And who cares if one of you has more on their “side’ of the bridal party; or that a bridesmaid can be a 'bridesman' etc.? There are some couples that even opt out of having people altogether. This keeps the focus solely on YOU and saves a lot of headache, drama, arguments over both minor and major details, and let’s face it, money. 

You HAVE To Invite Every Child Of Every Guest

This is simply not true. Weddings are mainly an adult occasion. If there aren’t children in your wedding party (be it your own or your friends/family’s offspring), it’s totally acceptable to forgo inviting children of guests. Of course someone may get offended, but let’s get real, someone will ALWAYS be offended about SOMETHING, but don’t let this stop you from having the wedding you desire. Just make this fact clear on the “save the date” and the formal invitations so that guests don’t automatically assume their offspring will be in attendance and can make advance preparations for child care for the big day.

You Must Follow A Strict Timeline For Your Reception

Again, this is YOUR day and if you want to go against the grain, and mix it up, then go ahead. Planning is essential but there is really no specific order in which you MUST do things. Plan your reception so it will be fun, hassle-free and memorable for everyone. And remember to let professionals help you at events of 70 or more guests.

So go ahead, toss the tradition and REALLY take control of your wedding. Forget the myths, superstitions and conventional wedding rules and have the wedding of your dreams. Don’t worry about offending anyone. It’s YOUR wedding, YOUR reception, YOUR day and YOUR marriage! Make it everything you’d hoped it would be..and more!

Wedding Liaison Blog

Carolyn Burke | Officiant | Coordinator
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